Valentine’s Day now ‘Cousin-Se-Dulhan’ Day: Punjaban University to promote local tradition on Feb. 14

NEWS BRIEF (Faisalabad)—In an effort to shun the irrelevant Western tradition of Valentine’s Day and promote the long standing local tradition of marrying cousins, Punjaban University will be celebrating Cousin-Se-Dulhan Day on Feb. 14.

“All these young boys and girls spend so much time writing love letters and buying chocolates for their so-called girlfriends and boyfriends, when in fact they’ll end up getting married to that cousin they always thought of as a sibling until after the first child,” said university president Zanana Khofiyaan. “So instead of wasting time on these false Western dreams, we want our youth to write letters to and buy chocolates for all of their cousins because statistically one of them is going to be their real jaanu for life.”